2012 Bully

I work.

Yes i know it sounds very cheap. Working doesn't suit bullies very well. Bullies supposed to be rich, and light, and easy, and DON'T WORK. But the fact is, I am officially a labor now. I know, i know, life is a big-time-unfair-bitch, i won't get start on that yet.

Anyway, since the working period, my life has been pretty much occupied by the works. And during that period, i learned a very important lesson (yes, we bitches sometimes learn something, but not too much, still keeping it light) ;

THE MORE SUCCESSFUL BITCH YOU ARE, THE LESS PEOPLE CAN ACCESS YOUR LIFE INFORMATION.

Let's see the case,

Whenever i go scuba diving or sailing on a yacht (oh yes, i am getting more faboulash every time), the world could not contact me at all. In additional, i was also very busy enjoying The Moment, no time at all for existence proving in cyber world (or Social Media world as we call it). And I met a lot of Super-Extremely-Successful People who rarely (or never) touch the Social Media.

WHY? Because successful people don't bother THAT CRAP. First, successful people have too many things to do in REAL LIFE so, the NOT-SO-REAL-OR-EVEN-NOT-REAL-AT-ALL-LIFE-CALLED-SOCIAL-MEDIA won't get even the tiny share of our serious attention portion. Second, IF we have the spare time, we use it for the REAL HOLIDAY getting away from those millions unworthy other insignificant common humans. We don't want to contaminate our precious happy moments with mortal rubbish. The more Successful people become, the more God-like they behave. Third, Successful People are Expensive People, and Expensive stuffs are always Limited. Only those who have the privilege could talk to them, see them, meet them, know them, or even just to hear about them.

So you active and well-known bloggers, or you twitter celebrities (and other unreal celebrities), EAT THAT!

That is the new lesson I learned in 2011.

By that, In the beginning of this 2012, I already set the new standards. Mark that mortal people. If you haven't heard about me, then you haven't deserve to know me. You're hitchhiking inter-cities, I'm hitchhiking inter-galaxies. I won't be bothered.

Ciao human beings. 

Those Are Why We Despite You

Folks keep questioning me: "why don't you befriend with geek mates?"

WHY???

First of all, they are weird. That's why we named them 'weirdo'. They think weird, they talk weird, they act weird. I don't get them. At all.

They don't stand to basic human qualification. They talk about things no one knows, in language no one knows. I'm sorry, but i'm keeping it real here. I want someone real as well. Not someone inhumane.

And look at all those creepy creatures, they don't have friends. Seriously. Have you ever seen a weirdo with friends? What's wrong with them you asked me?? Simple. These creatures are born with a particular gift--a tendency to be hated. As simple as that.
They annoy people with their incapabilities of interacting socially. It's not my fault no one wants to befriend with them.


And you're telling me to sympathyze these creatures?? No fvcking way.
I say it now: They are dangerous creatures. Seriously.


These kind of creatures are the most potential social climbers. Once they got the chance to gain popularity, they'll go for it. They are the worst ass-licking species. And once they're invited to the fame, they'll start to jerk-off. Trust me.

You think they don't care with such thing called popularity? because they're different? unique? intelligent? Bullshit. One that they care most is: Popularity. They just simply don't have a clue how to get it.
I don't believe there's someone reject popularity. That is just a Big Nonsense. People say it just because they can't afford it. It's called the denial proccess. Well I'm sorry, I CAN.

Face it, we're living in a jungle called life. There's no such thing called unique. We all want the same thing. Somehow, in one way or any other way, life is a Popularity Contest. And these creatures named weirdo, geek, whatever, are better to be bullied. They are the worst enemies for popular people, they climb social ladder, ALL THE TIME. And since they have low social interaction capabilities, they definitely will jerk-off. YES. An Ungrateful Species. Eat them! Or you'll be eaten.


So next time you asked me why i'm so cruel with those creepy bugs, help yourself read this fact.

Don't Mess With My Girls

Yes, i know, i'm a rotten cherry.
Yes, i realized some of my friends are just MEAN.
Yes, i befriend with the mean biatches.

They are my FRIENDS, so unless you are one of them, STAY OFF! Don't mess with them (or one of them). I dont give a shit even if you are some kind of saints or you have sixth sense or seventh or hell-yeah-ninety-ninth sense. My friends' enemies are my enemies as well. You mess with them, you mess with ME. I'll chop your head off!--literally.

*tribute to robespierre

"I am is I am"

This morning I read an article in a women magazine—the eye-candy-hot-tamale-guy section. It’s a covering story of this particular good looking metrosexual guy. Quite good-looking I have to admit. I mean, well, regular chicks will easily fall for him, straight to his bed. The article informs about the guy’s personal data, hobbies, activities, girl-type, and stuffs.

Then I came to this guy favorite quote. I read “I am is I am”. Wait, did I read it wrong? I took another look, and no, I didn’t. The article certainly write down “I am is I am”. I hesitated for a sec, then I burst into laughter. Holy Mother, Ave Maria, this article is unbelievable. Up to this point, i was curious if the magz editted it wrong, or they did it on purpose?
The image in the article portrayed that the guy is confident, successful, and attractive, and smart—like he is the perfect picture of guys to be worshipped. Wait, smart? No way. Oh no, no darling, he is just another pile of lump with dick stuck to it. This guy exactly doesn’t have a single clue. He is a total dickhead, brainless.

I mean, come on, it’s not very a special quotes. You can find it in every page in magazines or books. Then how possibly on earth he quoted it wrong?? Like “I am WHAT I am” is such a difficult phrase to remember?? Didn’t they teach them at elementary school that there can’t be two countinuously different ‘to be’ in a sentence or a phrase?? Did every boy bribeb the principal to pass the exam?? If not, why are these boys so incredibly stupid??

But then to think again, well, it’s merely a choice. Either you are good-looking or you are smart. You can’t be both. And then I took another look at the guy picture. Okay boy, you’ve got the look, it’s a wise choice. Like I’ve said before, knowledge kills you. After all, it won’t bring you anywhere. It won’t make you get laid, good-look will.

But then it made me come to think again, so the guys I date and slept with are all dumbass??? Shit. What was I thinking?? Oh, right, I forgot, I’m a shallow girl as well. What do I expect?? Stupid people reproduce, smart people masturbate.

The Skinny Bitches Justification*

The skinny vs. curvy thing has been bothering me a lot. After all the books I consumed, all the movies I slept with, all the music I dag—I have to admit this grotesque fact—I’m still obsessed with ‘being skinny’.

I am 164 cm height and 52 kg weight. And that is just fine—actually. But unfortunately, I still want to be skinnier, I want a 48. Yes, I do. I am one of those ungrateful bitches.

It happens a lot to come into my mind: ‘Why am I so shallow? Why am I trapped in this unhealthy mindset?’ I search, and explore, and hypothesize all the possibilities of justification of what I do. I don’t want to commit a crime without a conscience; I want to commit a crime in a fully aware conscience, on a strong groundwork of knowledge.

I happen to be not a very brilliant girl. I have no talent (like you have read before). I have no kindness and all of those behavior-inner-beauties bullshit. So what left for me? This mortal physical body. I have to make my best of it. The next question is: Why skinny? Why not curvy or athletic type? Simple, because being skinny takes a lot. You sacrifice all the oh-my-god-unbefvcklivable-so-delightful foods. You have to exercise constantly pretty much for the whole entire rest of your life. God knows, it takes everything—everything that definitely torches your soul. And when something takes a lot, it pays off a lot. Believe me.

When you’re skinny, it means that you are a hard worker. You deserve respect from others for your glorious efforts. Girls will look up to you. If they don’t, it’s simply because they are extremely jealous—they conceal the jealousy behind the hatred mask. Whose fault is that, if they can’t take care of their own body? Definitely not me. I’m not the one who put all the calories into their mouth, or sleeps in the exercise time. Don’t come to skinny girls and say things like “yeah, it’s easy for you, you were born skinny”, or “it’s genetic, there’s nothing I can do about it”. Oh please, like there’s no such thing called diet? Or cardio exercise? Puh-lease, give me a break. I worked my ass off to get into this shape. That’s why I bully. I have all the legitimate I need: PERSISTENT HARD WORK.

It’s okay if you prefer to keep your lard, but you know I can always bully you—face it. If you’re objected to it, then bully me back if you can. Show me your hard work ‘cause I’ve shown you mine. Admit it that being fat is not because simply your choices, but also because of your slackness—stop denying it. You think I am mean? Guess what? So is the universe!

*This justification could be used only by fierce people. For those who aren’t, get your hands off this piece of mind work. Stop trying.

Love It! #2

The 5 Stages of a Hangover


Stage 1 - Stupid: As you regain consciousness and begin to enjoy the headache, the churning stomach and the cold sweats you realise that you have lost not only several hours of your life but also the ability to concentrate on anything whatsoever. You are now STUPID and will remain so for a minimum of 12 hours.


Stage 2 - Ugly: Never entirely happy with the effects of the bathroom mirror first thing you are horrified to discover that you have now become even UGLIER than you previously thought possible. Not only do you have bloodshot eyes and a glorious collection of spots but you are shaking so much that your grandfather probably looks healthier.Unfortunately you are still too STUPID to know better than to try and shave whilst shaking or to remember the necessary beauty tips to paper over the cracks.


Stage 3 - Poor: Having crawled out of bed and got dressed, you are about to shamble out the door when you discover that the money that was suppose to last you the week is now missing from your wallet. You do however find a lime from one of your numerous Captain and Cokes from the night before in your pocket. Being STUPID, you have no idea what happened to it but the traces of "Chicken on a Stick" on your clothes allow the possibility that you might have treated everyone to grub at some point. Alternatively your pocket could have been picked or you might have given the taxi driver a fifty by mistake. Rationalising that you couldn't possibly have been that STUPID and that you would remember being robbed, you come to believe that you were the only one who bought any food or drinks all night and start to loathe all your friends.


Stage 4 - Fragile: As you are now STUPID, UGLY and POOR, your consequently FRAGILE self-esteem plummets. Your already fragile, physical condition, is made worse by this until you think you are likely to melt or shatter if handled at all roughly


Stage 5 - Circus Freak: This is the final stage of sobering up. Unfortunately, everyone can spot this CIRCUS FREAK condition and its cause from a great distance. Even worse, they know that they can complete your misery by making fun of you, and that you are too STUPID to retaliate, too FRAGILE to hit them, too POOR to bribe them and too UGLY to hide.

From:
http://blogs.myspace.com/captainmorgan_rum

Love It!

The 5 Stages of being a Drunken-Fool

Stage 1 - SMART This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject in the known Universe. You know you know everything and want to pass on your knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this stage you are always RIGHT. And of course the person you are talking to is very WRONG. This makes for an interesting argument when both parties are SMART.

Stage 2 - GOOD LOOKING This is when you realise that you are the BEST LOOKING person in the entire bar and that people fancy you. You can go up to a perfect stranger knowing they fancy you and really want to talk to you. Bear in mind that you are still SMART, so you can talk to this person about any subject under the sun.

Stage 3 - RICH This is when you suddenly become the richest person in the world. You can buy drinks for the entire bar because you have an armoured truck full of money parked behind the bar. You can also make bets at this stage, because of course, you are still SMART, so naturally you win all your bets. It doesn't matter how much you bet 'cos you are RICH. You will also buy drinks for everyone that you fancy, because now you are the BEST LOOKING person in the world.

Stage 4 - BULLET PROOF You are now ready to pick fights with anyone and everyone especially those with whom you have been betting or arguing. This is because nothing can hurt you. At this point you can also go up to the partners of the people who you fancy and challenge to a battle of wits or money. You have no fear of losing this battle because you are SMART, you are RICH and hell, you're BETTER LOOKING than they are anyway

Stage 5 - INVISIBLE This is the Final Stage of Drunkenness. At this point you can do anything because NO ONE CAN SEE YOU. You dance on a table to impress the people who you fancy because the rest of the people in the room cannot see you. You are also invisible to the person who wants to fight you. You can walk through the street singing at the top of your lungs because no one can see or hear you and because you're still SMART you know all the words.

From:
http://blogs.myspace.com/captainmorgan_rum
this guy is genius.